Approaching Modesty with Respect

Our Young Women president handled this so well this past week at Mutual, and I want to tell y'all about it.

The plan was to meet up at a local park and play water balloon volleyball. It involved tossing balloons with towels on a tennis court. Everyone showed up in street clothes, not bathing suits. Several older girls, including a visitor, came in the shortest of short shorts.

Our Young Women president wanted to say something about modesty to the girls, but wasn't sure if that setting was the best place. So she asked us advisors and her counselors in the presidency. It was discreet and out of earshot of any of the girls. 

Multiple leaders said no, that it was best not to do that with these particular girls. We're in a delicate situation with several of them, trying to help them attend more frequently and grow spiritually. They would not have handled the correction well. It likely would not result in a change in their behavior, except not to come back to church anymore.

She took that advice to heart and didn't say anything. We had a great activity and all the girls left more likely to return the next week.

I really appreciated her wisdom in pausing, asking for help and support from her presidency and leaders. It truly was a treasure to witness. I would definitely recommend that as an approach in the future.

Break Room Conversations as a Temple Worker

This past Friday, I was at the temple for my shift. And as you can imagine, I'm surrounded by older ladies there. I was in the break room with a woman who does veil scheduling. We got to talking about marriage and women who work because they asked if I do.

I said our transportation situation doesn't allow me to work, but I wish I could because I want to travel more and have my own money. And this sister, bless her heart, got all up in arms because I don't wait on my husband hand and foot, just because he works and I don't.

I do a lot of the housework exactly because I stay home. I can count the number of times my husband has used a toilet brush. But this sister took personal offense at the fact that I don't iron my husband's shirts and spread jam on his toast!

Being as tactful as I could, I said "I think you'd have a hard time convincing women in my generation to do that."

She looked right at me and said, "I just don't think it's right for a man to do the dishes after he works all day."

As someone who has spent hours cooking and doing dishes for meals my husband didn't even eat, I had to take a second, remember where I was.

"Some couples split cooking and dishes," I pointed out. "People in my generation realize this is simply a better way of doing things."

You'd have thought I had spit in her food, she was so disgusted with me. 

"That would never fly with my husband. I did all the cleaning AND worked."

I couldn't stop myself at this point. I just shrugged and said, "Well, I'm not his mother."

And that's the story of how this song became my new anthem.